Finding Purpose Beyond Numbers: A Mid-Career Reflection

After 13 years in sales, I find myself at a crossroads at age 39. The familiar path I've walked has begun to feel like it's leading nowhere, and the satisfaction I once found in my work has gradually faded into a complex mix of emotions. Don't get me wrong – there are moments that still light up my days. When I connect with clients who truly appreciate the value I bring, I'm reminded of why I chose this path in the first place. But these bright spots have become increasingly overshadowed by challenging interactions that drain my spirit and make me question my place in this industry. The environment around me has evolved into something I struggle to recognize. The culture has shifted to an almost ruthless pursuit of numbers, where success is measured purely in sales figures and targets. I watch my colleagues chase these metrics with an almost religious fervor, as if these numbers hold the secret to fulfillment. But in my heart, I know there must be more to life than this endless pursuit. The evidence is clear in the faces of those who've stayed and those who've left. My former colleagues who took the leap into new adventures seem to have found a lightness in their step, a renewed sense of purpose. Meanwhile, those who remain often wear their targets like heavy chains, convinced that these numbers are the only path to success. What's particularly challenging is witnessing the leadership's single-minded focus on profits. Every client interaction is viewed through the lens of potential revenue, every relationship reduced to a transaction. It's a mindset that leaves me feeling hollow, especially when I see genuine customer needs taking a backseat to sales targets. As I stand at this intersection of what was and what could be, I'm increasingly convinced that it's time for a change. The appreciation from genuine clients has been a gift, but as the saying goes, all good things must come to an end. Perhaps this ending is actually a beginning – a chance to redefine success on my own terms and find work that aligns with my values. I'm choosing to believe that somewhere beyond these spreadsheets and sales targets lies a path that will bring both purpose and peace. While the next step isn't yet clear, I'm hopeful that years from now, I'll look back on this decision to leave as the moment I chose authenticity over automation, purpose over profits. The future may be uncertain, but it feels infinitely more promising than the certainty of staying in a place that no longer serves my soul.